Useless Metaphysical Mechanic

*cough* *shudder* *splutter*
"Damn it, what's wrong this thing?"
*ding*
"Maybe I can help, sir?"
"I dunno. It was going alright, now it seems to have trouble going anywhere. I think it's got stuck."
"Let me check" *Hits it with a hammer* "Sorry, sir. I think you're going to have to make the best of it."
"Well what's wrong with it?"
‎"Like you said, sir, stuck. Just try giving it a shift in direction every now and then."
"I do, but the roads keep crumbling."
"Well, keep trying, sir, everyone's got to find their own path for their life. Sorry I couldn't be more help."
"Cliche spouting tit." *Hits life with spanner and swears at it*
"Come on, come on. I was supposed to be somewhere by now!"