I'm such a fickle fool

Not much has been done on The Carpenter's Apprentice in the past 3 weeks, I think my enthusiasm is waning again. Maybe when I finally get some feedback I'll pick up the pace again.

Instead I've been thinking on pitches for Abaddon when they reopen their doors in February.
There's one for Chronicles of the Afterblight that wouldn't come together for me last year that I now have a rudimentary story for, which is a step up from just having a situation, which is where I beached last year.
I also started work on a Zombie story. However this has merged with another idea I was working on, and suddenly I'm liking my set up and story too much to give it away. It's one of those things, it had a high concept premise, but as I worked out the story and started making character cnnections, I realised it could easily support a series on it's own. At that time I still planned to pitch it to Jon.
Now though, well, I'm thinking I could make more money out of this if I keep it to myself and get an agent and publisher.
But should I? Getting it to Abaddon and commisioned would mean a guaranteed amount, but nothing more. Not pitching it could mean getting less and not getting the kind of distribution they get.

I've just spent a half hour writing the first five hundred words, and it all flowed so nicely, I had a great time. I was starting to forget how much fun writing can be when it all just comes naturally.

Time will tell which way I swing on this, but even if I don't pitch it, I've got at least another 2 ideas for Abaddon, not counting the one i mentioned above.

Missed opportunities, coincidences and doing stuff.

So yesterday I got up at a ridiculous hour to do a car boot sale, an attempt to rid myself of the mountains of videos in my room.
It did not go well, I still have most of them.
What I want to tell you about however, is the meeting of a girl and how I've been kicking myself since.

She came up to the videos as I was packing away, we chatted, and it seemed she was vry much like a female version of myself - where taste in film is concerned, not in respect to facial hair.
We chatted, then she said she was waiting until her friend came back from uni to go see Clerks 2, and she walked on.
I thought to myself, I should give her my number and say if she ever wanted to go see a film, then she could always ring me.
I didn't, because I am me.
Ever since I've been wondering what might have been had I done so - ho hum.

David Bishop finally added me to his friends on MySpace on Friday. Yesterday I thanked him and told him the Graphic Novel was on indefinite hold due to my work on The Carpenter's Apprentice and no communication with Emma.
This morning I awake to find an email from Emma saying she is ready to crack on with the book and thinks it will be even better now she has learnt more.
Life's just weird.

So now I will be alternating between Quinn and my novel. Probably doing more on the novel as it's got much more to write and I've set a deadline of New Year to have it done by.
With Quinn I hope to publish it as 4 individual comics, possibly in black and white, saving the colour print for the collected GN.

Josephet Tate: Page One

Like I said yesterday, here is page one of Josephet Tate.
I doubt I'll ever write a better intro to a character than this.

Having re-read it, I now know where my friend got the Transmet vibe from, I do visualise it drawn by Darick Robertson, 'cos it never hurts to aim high.
Also it probably has something to do with the fact the character starts hairy and ends up bald, but this guy is nothing like Spider Jerusalem.

Here you are.

Page 1.

Panel 1.

Wide shot of a shuttle on a launch pad. Clearly preparing for launch.

CONTROLLER: (Bubbles should be spikey and run vertically down the side of the panel) 10. 9. 8. 7. 6. 5. 4.

Panel 2.

JOSEPHET is standing under the rocket boosters. His long hair and scraggly beard kind of go with the truly disgusting Hawaiian shirt he is wearing. He has a giant shit-eating grin on his face, and a fag hanging out the corner of his mouth.

JOSEPHET: 3. 2. 1. Rock On!

Panel 3.

The rocket bursts into life, beginning its climb towards the stars.

Panel 4.

JOSEPHET is now naked, his clothes having been burnt away by the force of the rockets. All his hair is gone as well, including his eyebrows. He does not look happy, like something has just failed him. There is no need to make this a full length image of him yeah? No little Josephet swinging in the wind cheers.

JOSEPHET: Fuck!

Panel 5.

JOSEPHET storms away from the launch pad. Marching purposefully.

JOSEPHET: I fucking loved that shirt!

Not doing much

I feel bloody knackered. Went to Brighton to pick up my latest comics subs today, and it's killed me.
Picked up book 1 of Planetary (I know, late to the party). Liked it, then looked at my MySpace messages to see one from Warren Ellis announcing that Planetary ends today. Done, finished, kaputski. Oh well, I think I'll be getting the other trades.

Tried to write, did 2 and some pages on Josephet Tate and the more I write, the more it feels like I'm ripping Warren Ellis off. My friend read the first page and said it read like Transmetropolitan, it has that vibe. Whether that means I'm writing well or just taking off a great writer in a poor story, I don't know.
May post page one tomorrow, I like that page.

Fell short of my 6 page aim, but brain is fried.

Trailer Remixes

This has been going on for a while now, but I found some new ones to share with you.

School of Rock as a Psycho thriller


Groundhog Day as a thriller


The Sound of Music as a tense political thriller


Ferris Bueller in Terminator 4

Quick Strip

No, not like that. Get your filthy minds out of the gutter.
A quick one from StripCreator.

Death Can't Take a Holiday

Not much work done on the book yesterday, and the weekends I get off. At least I'm creating something though.
Gotta keep those juices flowing. Not those juices! Oh I give up.

Making quick comics.

I have recently been introduced to the site StripCreator
I've only made one so far, but more will come I'm sure.

Check it out.

Keeping yourself interested.

I've noticed that when I do my daily target of words (3 times this week!) I tend to end the days work the same way I try to end a chapter, with something interesting, exciting or cliffhangerish.
It makes me want to keep telling the story the next day. So far I only failed on Wednesday, because I was so exhausted.
6000 words this week, I think I'm looking at an 80 to 90,000 word novel here, when originally I was planning on about 60,000.
Things keep happening though, I know where the story is going, I know who's who, but I don't know all the characters yet. Just introduced a new one, who was supposed to be a craven coward who dies later in a rearguard action. Now he's something else, still probably going to die, but not until the second novel at this rate.

3 scratchcards down, no money yet. 1 carried over to next week (Wednesday ticket).

Membership has benefits

Despite any claims to the contrary I may have made back in June, the only habit 've picked up is avoiding doing anything, and that's not new.

Well, a new leaf has been turned, rolled up and dunked in hot water to make a cup of tea. And now I'm fully refreshed in a classically British way, I can move on.

Last night I finally reached what I am provisionally calling the end of Book One of The Carpenter's Apprentice. All the main characters are established, truths revealed, skills demonstrated, bad guys smacked around, cue massive battle and time to get on with the plot.
It's been about 8 years since I first started work on this book, for the BBC's New Talent scheme where they wanted some children's novels as submissions. Kind of glad I didn't advance. I'm sure I would have finished the book back then if I had, but it was much more your generic fantasy plot, with 8 years of procrastination and thought the characters are much more developed and there is a massive overarching plot for the whole world.
It was this giant backstory that had me stumped for so long, it had grown so big and complicated that I lost sight of the smaller story I was actually telling with this book.

Today sees the start of plotting and writing for Book Two, another 45000 words and I should have a completed novel to start harrassing agents with.
However, crippling doubts have crept in, the only reason I managed to finish Book One is a series of bribes, promises and threats I made to myself. To save myself from this I'm collecting a bunch of readers from my gaming clan to read Book One and let me know if it is actually worth my time to continue on with this story, or if it's time to pack it away and make a start on one of the three other projects I have waiting for me to start.

It's not writers block.

And I'll prove that right now by writing a post on here.

No, instead what I am suffering from right now is my famous cannotdecideitis.
It's a tragic and debilitating problem that leaves you looking at five or six different projects and being unable to decide which one to write.
Professional writers, I imagine, don't suffer from this, they've got a deadline to meet and nearest deadline gets done first.
As an aspiring author, who has no deadlines or contractual worries, no money hanging on this decision, I can't choose.
Do I carry on with the 2/3 maybe 1/2 completed children's novel? Maybe do the post-apocalyptic novel that readers of the synopsis have cheered on. Perhaps I could do the action/horror novel I keep talking about.
I could even get on with one of several comic ideas. Perhaps work on that TV script I've been planning.

But which one? I can't choose, every day I think a different one is my best bet.
Tomorrow I'm implementing my reward plan, buying a scratchcard for every day of the week and if I meet my target for the day (6 pages of script or 2000 words of prose) then I get to scratch that days card. No day can ever have more than 3 cards on it, and on complettion of any project (except short stories and comics under 22 pages long) I get to scratch all of them.
It may cost me £5 a week to do this, but hopefully it'll motivate me, and there's always and outside chance my reward scheme will make me rich.

Somethings have happened.

Hello again. Last time we spoke I was preparing for a weekend in London, having had over a week to recover, I feel I can now talk about it.

Things didn't start too brilliantly when my train into London was delayed by 20 minutes, not that I noticed during the wait, which is the joy of being stuck head first into a good book.
After meeting up with my mate, we left for our first excusrion of the weekend. Across London on the mighty and mostly regular public transport system to a pub called The Griffin. My friend had explained this pub to me before, and some months earlier an epic cross-city trek to see it's unbridled fruits had come apart at the twelth hour, literally, as the place closes at midnight and that was our arrival time. This time we arrived early enough to see the young ladies of delight.
I have to say I was shocked, shocked I tell you. A pound in a pint glass from everyone for the girl to get up and strip, Sky Sports on the big screen between girls, offers of private dances, you'd probably join me in thinking that the "girls" would be 40 year old mum's with saggy boobs. But not, extremely attractive, nice smelling and very flexible girls are the order of the day. They get up on stage and wow the crowd with skillful displays of pole grinding. One girl even kept winking at the audience, and not with her eyes! (That's muscle control for you!)

Upon leaving the wonderful world of winking brown eyes, we set forth on a mission to buy more beer
"Hey, supermarkets do 24 hour beer selling now."
"Really? Let's get some more then."
As you can tell, a lot of thought went into our plan. Approaching the Sainsbury's, that most dreadful of "in the middle of London" afflictions struck us, the over full bladder. With pubs chucking out to the sides, there was no chance of slipping inside for a crafty non-customer piss, so it would be down to the many and varied alleys of London. Which presents a larger problem, clearly people have grown fed up of going to work and stepping over rivers of piss in the morning, so now all the visible alleys are well let and CCTV'd. The lights are not as much of a problem as the cameras are, you never know who is going to be sat there at a bank of monitors, hand on the zoom control, waiting for me to whip out my magnificent manhood. The solution is the age old "covering each other" mission. Which does not mean peeing all over your friend.
Bladders dry, river of golden glory stepped over, to Sainsbury's we did go.

At which point it was back to his, beers, Whatever on Channel 4, and that program is a big steaming turd if ever I watced one, and passing out on a settee.


I'll tell you about Saturday later.



In more interesting news, I've had 2 submission acceptances since my return.
One was for Zarjaz, the 2000ad fanzine, which I sent a Sinister Dexter story into a few months ago. Apparently he liked it and sent it to an artist, but forgot to mention it to me.
The Second was for the publishers of Sancho, the nice Irish lads over at 20000-Leagues. Nina and Styx, the everyday story of a teenage goth girl and her demonically possesed teddy bear will be seeing print, hooray! The acceptance email called Styx a classic character, which is cool, because I loved that trapped-in-a-cuddly-toy maniac!

Now, if I could just write something that I get paid for...


Oh, I didn't get the job. Hey-ho. But I do have the opportunity to buy a business, so there's stuff a-coming.

Hup Bang a lang.

And that title makes as much sense as a banana with a machine gun in a vegan restaurant.
Yeah, whatever.
You may guess (or you could look at the dates of past posts and see) that I've not been here for a while. The reason? It was so hot this summer, my brain actually melted and I've stored it in the fridge until it coalesced into a solid enough lump to force back in through my ear with a reasonable expectation that it would stay there.

But stuff has happened.
I started writing The Carpenter's Apprentice again, and have stopped for the 57th time. One day I'll even get the website up and running.
I am going to see if me and Jon can mesh our minds together and create a printable Future Shock or Terror Tale.
Finally, I had an interview today for the post of Freelance Reporter for the Six Vllages area. The fact there's about 12 villages in the area not-withstanding.
Got to say, I've never been more relaxed in an interview, I was not even slightly nervous. It's not like I'm convinced that I am the best for the job, I'm sure I can do it, but still.
Guess I'm just at a stage now where I can take what comes with ease.

Except for the fact that I still can't fit into my suit!
Damn podgy wasteline! But snacks are so nice. Humph!

Anyway, I'm back. But tomorrow I'm going to London for a "Nearly my birthday" piss up.
I may even try to get the APEs to come to The Church on Sunday.

So, next post will be Monday at the earliest. Let's see what the weekend brings!

I'm Spider-Man!

See above

I'm Spider-Man!

Your results:
You are Spider-Man

Spider-Man 85% Green Lantern 70% Hulk 65% The Flash 55% Robin 48% Superman 45% Catwoman 45% Supergirl 43% Batman 40% Iron Man 35% Wonder Woman 23%

You are intelligent, witty, a bit geeky and have great power and responsibility.

Gotta make it a habit!

Wow, over a fortnight since my last post. I put off one because I was going to a wedding, then I never got around to it, and now I'm off to another tomorrow (wedding on Saturday, but 3+ hour travelling means a day before journey), what a train-set lifestyle I lead! (Because I'm too poor to travel anwhere by jet!)

So anyway. I have now written about 30 pages of the as-yet-untitled Courier follow up. Only about 80-ish to go.
Emma has made a start on the artwork, but it's going to be a long old slog before I'm happy with every line of dialogue and she's done all of the art. Sometome next year, which for someone who hops projects like fury is a long time for me, but I'm committed to this.

And I have to make posting here a habit. If anyone read it it might spark some interesting posts from any comments and questions people have. But as I'm all alone out here, I may just slpip into madness. Is blogging to yourself more mental than talking to yourself?

Moving in general directions.

Chapter 3 has been written, rewritten and had an extra page of violence added!
Huzzah!
However, it's still taking me too long to write my pages, I was going to stick with doing 2 a day, but I too often don't do anything in a day. Still, that makes about 24 pages done of a guesstimated 100. Although I'm thinking it's going to run over that, and I've been restraining myself!

I found out last week that I no longer fit into my suit! It's a terribvle and tragic thing, especially as I'm going to Sabrina's wedding on Saturday! I have enforced a rigid exercise programme on myself, and tried to cut down on my food intake, but it's so hard when there is nothing else to do around here.
Tomorrow I try the trousers on again and decide if I'm going to make it or if I need new trousers.

Saw X-Men 3 yesterday, and I liked it.
I then went on to read the reviews and comments of people online to see what others thought of it. And the split in opinion comes down to this
Movie goers - liked it, it had spectacle, humanity (mutantity?) and cool effects, even if there were a couple of wasted characters.
Comic book fanboys - hated it. Hated having their stories of their childhood crammed into this one film. It seems they want the film to either be all about the Pheonix or all about the Cure, not both.
I felt it worked fine, but comic book fans think the movie should appeal to them, whe in reality they are just a tiny, very vocal minority, of the people who will go to see this film. From sales figures I've seen, maybe 250 000 people buy X Men comics, over 8 times that number of people saw the film on opening weekend. Sorry boys, but appealing just to you isn't worth the money to make a film.

Ronery

I'm So Ronery
I'm so ronery
So ronery
So ronery and sadry arone
There's no one Just me onry Sitting on my rittle throne I work very hard and make up great prans
But nobody ristens, no one understands
Seems that no one takes me serirousry
And so I'm ronery A little ronery
Poor rittre me
There's nobodyI can rerate to
Feer rike a bird in a cage It's kinda sihry
But not rearry
Because it's fihring my body with rage I work rearry hard and I'm physicarry fit
But nobody here seems to rearize that
When I rure the world maybe they'rr notice me
But untir then I'rr just be roneryRittre ronery, poor rittre me
I'm so ronery I'm so ronery

(Lyrics to I'm So Ronery by Trey Parker)
Yeah, I'm having a poor day, and now I have hiccups!

Got 1 page done on a Sinister Dexter stiry I plan to send to Zarjaz, beyond that, done nothing worthwhile in over a week and a half. So much for 2 pages a day.

Launch Pad

Presenting Launch Pad, the Superhero with Explosive Diarrhea as his power!
Drawn by Lee O Connor at the very end of this weeks Bristol Con when he offered to do a sketch, but neither of us could think of what he should do. And so I came up with, this guy.

And isn't it great.
I will have to do a 1 page story about him saving a cat or something.

Check out Lee's website at http://www.leeoconnor.com/

Back on Track.

OK, so last time's post was all about some cock ups at the benefit agency and I felt a need to vent a little.

Now I am well and truly back on track, keeping myself to a minimum of 2 pages a day for the Quinn Graphic Novel, hopefully Emma will be getting some artwork to me in the next few weeks.
Chapter 2 after a long and torturous time is now done. It's has turned out to be a slow, wordy chapter, so it's shorter than I originally planned. However, I spent ages trying to make it work by mixing in the action from the 3rd chapter to keep the pace going. Unfortunately that just wouldn't work for me. So now Chapter 3 is going to be slam bang all action and funky futurstic gadgets. Because what's the point of writng a futuristic undercover-cop-versus-London-underworld in mad-shooty-death if you don't add the crazy furturistic technology, like bullets that track by video camera and can turn corners after fired?

The Carpenter's Apprentice is on hold again, until I finish re-reading The Chronicles of Prydain again, a series I heartily recommend. They were the basis for the Disney pic The Black Cauldron, but the books are much better. Although any Disney film that has zombie warriors is alright in my book.

There you go, news, revelation and a recommendation, what more to you want?

Ok, maybe a chuckle at David Blaine's expense.

Rant (Spoiler, contains lots of swearing)

Fuck you
Fuck you all.
Fuck all of you with your working bodies and physical ability to hold a full time job.Fuck you for not having to live with your parents.
Fuck you with your "It's only £9 a month you can afford that can't you", because no, I fucking can't
Fuck you and your World of Warcraft addiction and those of you that only post in that fucking forum.
Fuck the DWP and their fucking up of my claim for the fourth fucking time. Fuck them and their "We made a decision in June last year." Fuck off you did, you never said a fucking word, except to send the wrong fucking form which you were told about.
Fuck the government and their downsizing of the Benfit Agency workforce, all you're doing is putting inexperienced people in place over experienced people and causing disruption to the system.
Fuck you and your "We want people off Incapacity benefit and into work", I try and you fuck me over.
Fuck you, whoever happens to be Minister for Employment and Benefits now. Fuck you you stupid sack of shit. The system worked, now it doesn't, and that's your fucking fault you public schoolboy retard.
Fuck you Blair, you were never Labour, there hasn't been a Labour government for over 20 years now.
Fuck you middle class wankers who think everything is OK when the people at the bottom who need your help most, the people that you are supposed to be working to improve their lives, get shat on everyday.
Fuck you and your telling me you made a decision in June last year and I shouldn't have been getting any money since then. I play nice, I play in the system, I spend hours filling in forms and making sure everything is double checked, and then you hire retard fuckwads who can't look at my whole file because it's still restricted access 3 years after working there and you fuck me.
Fuck off with your patronising smiles.
Fuck you and your happy lives, planning weddings, going to Comic conventions.
Fuck all of you who can do everything I want, but fuck you to my body which betrays me on a daily fucking basis.
I WANT OUT!


For those unable to read between the lines, I had a letter today telling me they are stopping my benefit for reasons that don't make sense. Also that the decision was made in June last year and I shouldn't have been getting money since then.

The only thing I got in June last year was a form about me working, which was the wrong form and they were told that.

Rage rage rage.

This was supposed to be a good few weeks, Bristol Comic Expo next weekend, a wedding a fortnight later and another a fortnight after that.
If this stands, I won't be going to any of them.